Tag: relationships

Adelaide

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Rating: ⭐⭐⭐⭐
Author: Genevieve Wheeler
Genres: Fiction
Pub. Date: April 2023

I don’t know what to make of this book. I was intrigued when it popped up on Book of the Month because a lot of the reviews talk about how messed up the narrative is. It’s been compared to Sally Rooney, who I’ve been wanting to read, so I decided to try it out. I’d love to know if this is actually comparable to Sally Rooney from someone who’s read both though, because as much as I liked it, I need to emotionally prepare myself to read Sally Rooney if that is the case.

Adelaide is the unremarkable story of a white American girl who moves to London for her Masters degree and falls in love with both the city and a boy named Rory Hughes. Despite their initial attraction, Rory is emotionally unavailable and as Adelaide falls more and more in love with him, she gives up more of herself to this man who seems unable to love her back. After a shocking event sends both of them careening, their mental health suffers and both must learn how to cope and live in the world, with or without each other. 

I was expecting this story to be more shocking than it turns out to be. I was expecting either psychological trauma along the lines of Gone Girl or physical abuse. What you get instead is a very real story about a woman who gives too much of herself to a man incapable of appreciating it or walking a mile in her shoes. I hated Rory, but I loved the way he is portrayed. This is the kind of ongoing micro-abuse that is so hard to pinpoint and articulate in the moment. You can overlook an insensitive comment or an ignored text in isolation, but over time they add up to make a woman feel extremely neglected. The hurts are minor enough that any adverse reaction to them seems like an over-reaction or “crazy” behavior, but frequent enough that they will drive a person nuts over time.

Adelaide gives so much of herself to this man. He is generally only honest with her about his feelings and while that hurts, I think most people would say they prefer honesty to false proclamations of love. Rory is hurting, but he fails to acknowledge Adelaide’s own struggles and she completely empties her tank on a man who gives her no emotional support in return. He needs for Adelaide to always be a bright spot for him to lean on, without ever recognizing that Adelaide also has her own emotional needs. Read as a 300 page narrative, it’s easy to see where Rory goes wrong, but I do believe that as a lived experience, a lot of women excuse or overlook these kinds of behaviours.

So ultimately I think I did really like this. I got frustrated with Adelaide for putting up with Rory’s crap, but I never blamed her for it. I think it’s easy to get lost in your love for another person and she’s never been properly loved by a man in the past. She was also lacking in family support, but I loved the inclusion of so many meaningful female friendships in her life. I think the author really captured the unselfish nature of a really good friendship between women and captured the reality of those lost years in your 20’s when you’re finished school and trying to live as much of life as you can before inevitably having to “settle down”.

The only thing I didn’t really like is that I think the overall atmosphere of the book is a bit pretentious. I had no problem empathizing with Adelaide on an emotional level, but I also recognize that it is a very privileged experience to be able to run away to an expensive city like London to pursue higher education. Plus then she just walks out of a Master’s degree in literature and right into a prestigious publishing job? It was a little unbelievable and not relatable to many struggling millennials. Her and Rory are running around London going to the theatre and talking about high brow literary classics while the rest of their generation are struggling to find jobs that enable them to pay off loans and still be able to afford a place to live.

So it could be easy to dismiss Adelaide, but at the end of the day, she struggled with her mental health just like any other person (as did Rory). The difference is that Adelaide, as a woman, has been conditioned to ignore her pain, whereas Rory is content to wallow in it and lord his loss over Adelaide. 

So there you go, I guess I do know what to make about this book! One of the reasons I love writing reviews so much is because it gives me the opportunity to reflect on a book and it helps me to collect and process my thoughts. This is definitely not a must read book and it is incredibly sad, but if you feel like exercising your feelings and escaping deep into the psyche of another person, then check it out. Genevieve Wheeler definitely commits to this character and it makes for an impressive debut.

Us Against You

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Rating: ⭐⭐⭐.5
Author: Fredrik Backman
Genres: Fiction
Read: Mar. 2018 (Pub date: Jun. 5, 2018 in North America)

Thank you to Atria Books, Simon and Schuster, and Netgalley for providing me with a free electronic copy of this book in exchange for an honest review.

As some people might be aware (because I can’t stop talking about it), Beartown was my favourite book of 2017, so I was super happy to get an advance copy of the sequel, Us Against You, and I even re-read Beartown to get back up to speed on all the characters. I loved Beartown just as much the second time around, but I was really nervous about this one because I didn’t think Beartown really needed a sequel and it’s easy to kill a good thing milking the cash cow too long.

Disclaimer: Beartown spoilers below plus minor spoilers for Us Against You, but nothing you don’t learn early in the story.

Us Against You starts where Beartown leaves off. It’s summer, but everyone is anxiously awaiting to see what will happen to their beloved hockey team in the fall and Peter is worried that there may not even be a hockey club to be anxious about. Kevin and his family disappear overnight, but Maya’s family decides to stay. Beartown is their town as much as anyone else’s and they believe they shouldn’t be made to feel unwelcome.

Most of the former Junior team has followed their coach David to Hed, but Amat, Bobo, and Benji remain behind in Beartown. In the absence of the former team and coach, several newcomers arrive on the scene and hockey and politics become more intertwined than ever.

Fredrik Backman’s writing is just as beautiful as ever in this book. The novel continues in the same voice as its predecessor and it is just as lyrical and insightful. My copy of Beartown is tabbed everywhere with quotes that I loved and I tabbed a lot of well written passages in this book as well. But sadly, some parts of this book just didn’t work for me.

As a standalone, Beartown offers a varied perspective of the plot. Backman takes us on a journey with his characters and their perspectives are all incredibly moving. Beartown is very much a character driven book, but it still had a strong plot to carry it forward. Us Against You is still a character driven novel, but the plot isn’t as strong and it struggled to carry all these voices.

The plot is slower than Beartown and there is a lot of political drama that is just too convoluted and honestly, doesn’t even really matter that much. Backman tells us in the synopsis that before the end of the novel someone will be dead, and he builds his plot around this climax. The drama builds between Hed and Beartown and hate and violence lead to more hate and violence, culminating in tragedy for everyone.

Backman continues with some of the themes from Beartown, examining the long-lasting impact that rape can have on a girl and her family, and the sense of community that comes from a shared love of sports. Backman also explores the compounding impact of violence and our resistance to change. Hockey has always been seen as a men’s club and those men can feel very threatened when faced with equality politics and will try and protect themselves at the expense of anyone who does not fit within their idea of who hockey is for.

So I very much loved the themes of this book, but I struggled more with the perspectives. We’re given a lot of new perspectives in this book, which is great, but we also lose a lot of the perspectives from the previous book of characters we’ve already come to know and love. I really liked that this book expanded to include Maya’s brother Leo and more of William Lyt, but it also included a lot about the Pack and this is where it got bogged down for me. I wasn’t really interested in Peter’s feud with the Pack or with Richard Theo’s schemes. Richard Theo serves to mount the tension within the towns, but I don’t think he was needed. His schemes were too convoluted and the characters could have carried the plot without him. Hed and Beartown would have been at each other’s throats, regardless of the drama with the factory jobs and the political scheming.

I thought the novel had a great start with William and Leo fighting and the breakdown of the Andersson Family. I thought Kira and Peter’s storyline was so heartbreaking, but it felt so real and I could empathize with how the strain of losing your firstborn and your daughter being raped would slowly start to breakdown your marriage. Likewise, I love where Backman takes us with Maya, Ana, and Benji in this book. Benji was one of my favourite characters in Beartown and you just ache for him reading his story. He is one of those totally perfect, imperfect characters. I thought all of these storylines were strong and they really carried the novel for me.

But like I said, I struggled with the Pack. I didn’t care about Teemu and I thought Vidar came in too late into the story for me to really care about him either. I get what the Pack means to Teemu, Woody, Spider, and Vidar, but I think Backman communicates this concept of family and community just as well through his other characters. Likewise, the Pack served to escalate the violence between Hed and Beartown, but again, I think this theme could have been carried just as well through other characters like Lyt. I really liked the idea of Vidar and I’m thrilled Backman decided to spend some time on the goalie, which is an essential part of any team, but Vidar lacked developed at the expense of the rest of the Pack. I would rather see his character fully realized than have all the secondary Pack characters.

I am disappointed that David didn’t have a voice in this story and that Amat and Bobo’s voices were limited. I really liked all of these characters and I really think Backman could have given them more in this story. We hear very little from the Beartown players who switch to Hed. They go to Hed to play for David, not Hed and I would have liked to hear more about how they felt about suddenly playing for their rival and the struggle of losing the support of their community. It’s kind of taken for granted that the boys and their families would all just change allegiance to Hed (and that Hed would accept them), but they were all Beartown born and still lived there, so I felt that suddenly playing for their rival would be a real source of conflict for some of the players and that they would struggle to be accepted by Hed and the other members of the existing A-team.

My biggest struggle with this book though is the emotional pacing. I felt this book was more emotionally manipulative than the first book and the writing started to feel a little repetitive. Beartown is an incredibly powerful, emotional read and Backman uses a lot of the same phrases and wording to try and create those cathartic moments, but they lose their impact when you read them 3 and 4 times throughout the novel.

This book is just damn depressing. Like I said, Beartown is definitely an emotional read, but it still has hopeful and happy moments to contrast the sad ones. Us Against You has very few hopeful moments. It is just down, down, down for the entire novel and any happy or hopeful plot points are just too small to bring this book back up. I felt like I was falling into the pits of despair throughout the whole book and I never had any chance of climbing back out.

We’re told in Beartown that 2 of the boys will turn professional and that the young girl, Alicia, will grow up to be the best hockey player Beartown has ever seen. So I can’t help but assume that Beartown must succeed at some point for these players to achieve success and I want to read about it! I don’t know if Backman has a third book planned for this series, but I could see this having another book and I really hope it does because I need to see Beartown transformed. I’ve seen them beaten down and shit on and now I need to see them heal and grow. I didn’t think Beartown needed a sequel, but now that it has one, I really need it to be a trilogy so that this can be the dark middle book. This works as the angst-y middle book, but not as the finale. This story feels unfinished and I really hope it gets a (better) conclusion.

For this reason it’s a hard book to rate. Granted, I am holding Backman to a higher standard because of how phenomenal Beartown was, and I still loved the writing and several of the character arcs in Us Against You, but I need more from this series now! I think there’s a lot of potential for a final book and if that is the case, it would change my review. I don’t mind being brought low in book 2 if you’re going to raise me up in book 3. But if this is where it ends, I am definitely left disappointed.

FYI, you can pre-order Us Against You at fredrikbackmanbooks.com